Re: FRIENDS- Z ()

Re: FRIENDS- Z
Posted by Paige on July 3, 2009 at 21:37:56

In reply to: Re: FRIENDS- Z* posted by I am strong on July 3, 2009 at 16:58:06*

Wow, I think all MM do share the same scripts. Its amazing how reading everyones stories can be so relatable. My MM and I are working on becoming just friends. His wife just had a baby, and thats where i drew the line. But we also work together, so going without contact, which is what i feel I need, isn't really an option. Fortunately he's off on maternity leave for the next couple weeks.
The thing that stops me from thinking that we can't be friends is I feel he lied and manipulated me. He used to tell me he loved me, and then when I broke it off with him he told me he never really loved me. then he bounced around between still loving me, and not knowing what love is.
Some days I ask myself, 'how can i be friends with a man who i can't respect or trust'. but some days I think he told me he doesn't love me to make it easier on him (and maybe me), and that he really did, or stil does love me.
Its also hard, because we were best friends for the longest time. So i didn't just lose a lover, but my closest friends, and of course none of my other friends knew about the relationship. Which is why I think this message board is so fantastic. hearing stories from incredible women, who know exactly what I'm talking about.
This website really is a beautiful thing!!!

> > Mine and I didn't remain friends...
> >
> > However, I would turn it around and ask if this friendship is in secret or if it is an open friendship... i.e. would his W be ok if you call the house and talked to him or would he call you while his W was at home?
> >
> > Friends should not be a secret. If it is, it's no friendship at all.
> >
> > Also, if you don't want to be friends with him, then why are you pretending that it is cool when it isn't with you? Why would you torture yourself with a friendship you didn't want?
> >
> > > Has anyone (I am sure) on here had a mm that wants to stay friends (which is vurtually impossible). They call or text and they seem so happy and it makes you want to reach through the phone and karate chop them in the adams apple? All the while you act like it's cool and your ok , but truthfully you feel like your dying inside and you wished they were too?
> > >
> > > Ok , IAS , just breathe........
>
>
> Z those are two questions I am asking my self daily. You are right , I know this , I can't shake the feelings yet, I am working on it trust me.

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> Wow, I think all MM do share the same scripts. Its amazing how reading everyones stories can be so relatable. My MM and I are working on becoming just friends. His wife just had a baby, and thats where i drew the line. But we also work together, so going without contact, which is what i feel I need, isn't really an option. Fortunately he's off on maternity leave for the next couple weeks. > The thing that stops me from thinking that we can't be friends is I feel he lied and manipulated me. He used to tell me he loved me, and then when I broke it off with him he told me he never really loved me. then he bounced around between still loving me, and not knowing what love is. > Some days I ask myself, 'how can i be friends with a man who i can't respect or trust'. but some days I think he told me he doesn't love me to make it easier on him (and maybe me), and that he really did, or stil does love me. > Its also hard, because we were best friends for the longest time. So i didn't just lose a lover, but my closest friends, and of course none of my other friends knew about the relationship. Which is why I think this message board is so fantastic. hearing stories from incredible women, who know exactly what I'm talking about. > This website really is a beautiful thing!!! > > > > Mine and I didn't remain friends... > > > > > > However, I would turn it around and ask if this friendship is in secret or if it is an open friendship... i.e. would his W be ok if you call the house and talked to him or would he call you while his W was at home? > > > > > > Friends should not be a secret. If it is, it's no friendship at all. > > > > > > Also, if you don't want to be friends with him, then why are you pretending that it is cool when it isn't with you? Why would you torture yourself with a friendship you didn't want? > > > > > > > Has anyone (I am sure) on here had a mm that wants to stay friends (which is vurtually impossible). They call or text and they seem so happy and it makes you want to reach through the phone and karate chop them in the adams apple? All the while you act like it's cool and your ok , but truthfully you feel like your dying inside and you wished they were too? > > > > > > > > Ok , IAS , just breathe........ > > > > > > Z those are two questions I am asking my self daily. You are right , I know this , I can't shake the feelings yet, I am working on it trust me.