SheeDevil

It's been three years since I first met my MM. I was moved to anotherjobto replace a lower seniority person and found myself working next to(in myeyes, at least) the most beautiful male creature I ever had thepleasure tobe near. (Oh, how cheesy .. but true ... :) ...) For some reason, we'clicked' from the beginning. I enjoyed being with him, being hisfriend,having someone there I could count on. I trusted him implicitly and wejustgrew closer and closer together as time passed. He flirted with me fromdayone, but my low self - esteem wouldn't allow me to see it as anythingbutthe usual male flirting. (If I had only known then what I know now ...sheesh ...) I only knew that he was one of my best friends and slowly,overa period of about a year, thanks to his constant attentions I graduallyletgo of my shyness and gained confidence. I always knew it was because ofhimand that only made him even more special to me.

As time passed and westarted talking more and more about our feelings, I discovered that itwasn't just an act - he truly did want me. It was just before vacationtimeand one thing led to another and we made plans to meet one night afterwork. I had about four days of see-sawing between "should I" or"shouldn'tI" before that night and after many many hours of agonizing soul -searching I figured that it will only be once (oh, how naive can one be???) and if I don't I might always wonder ....

Needless to say I spent three of the most beautiful hours of my life inhisarms and have started something that confuses the heck out of me. I amhappy to have him, but sad I can't keep him. I am always anxious to seehimbut apprehensive someone will find out. All this is so new to me but atleast there are no delusions and for that I am always grateful. I knowwhere we stand, and how it must be. As for the future, I can hope anddream, but it must work itself out ...........