Sugar

Where do I begin this tale? As with many of us, I too met my MM through work. Only little catch to my story is that we live and work about 2,000 miles apart. His company and mine are partners, one being on the east coast and the other in the midwest. I knew he was married from the start, I myself am single and have never been married. When I first started talking with him, we would exchange pleasantries, occasionally we would ask what each other had planned for the weekend. Typical co-worker sort of stuff. Thing is, from the first moment I heard his voice, all I could think about was what it would be like to get him here, and take him out to a club with me, maybe get him get him drunk and take advantage of him. :)

As the last few years progressed we became more friendly with each other, until that fateful conversation when I responded to a comment of his with a not so subtle innuendo. That was the turning point for us. We both have the same online chat program. So we exchanged screen names and away we went. In the beginning we must have spent at least 4 or 5 hours a day sending messages back and forth to each other. We would come home from work and continue those conversations until his wife would come home. Sometimes she would even be in the same room as him. Phone conversations lasted hours also. I never before met someone that I could naturally talk to about everything from current affairs to how we eat our cereal.

This went on for a few months, neither one of us really thinking anything would come out of it except for friendship, as he does loves his wife to death (his words). He would call me from his hotel room when he was on business trips, again talking until the wee hours. If his wife was out of town he would ask me to call him, no matter what time I came in from the clubs. I called him once at 5 am, a bit drunk, and we talked for a hours. I could go on and on...but I will spare you. :)

We decided to meet. It seemed like the opportunity just dropped into our laps. He had to attend a conference not far from where I live. After serious discussion we decided we wanted to do this. Please understand that while I was falling in love with him over the phone and the net, he was doing the same. And we both took into consideration his situation. As in one conversation we had I told him that my heart recognized him long before I would allow my head to do so. How else can I explain that I always wanted to meet him just by talking with him?

To cut to the chase, I drove to where he was, having to hide from my bosses who were attending the same conference. We met in the hotel bar (we previously exchanged photographs). We talked a bit, I was shaking terribly, as was he. Then it happened. I never saw it coming either. All I knew was that I felt his lips on mine, just a gentle soft kiss like you would give a child. That kiss literally took my breath away, left me so dazed that I couldn't think!

We spent the next 48 hours in his hotel room, he only leaving to attend his meetings. We talked a lot, and yes we made love (a lot too). I know now the meaning of soul mate. That was last June. It has been the one and only time I have seen him. We still talk as much as we can at work and via the net. We are trying to plan our next meeting, some time this June. I love him dearly. I know he loves me and he also loves his wife. He is not going to leave her, I never even thought that he would.

I can't excuse what I am doing, but I love him. It isn't easy being in an affair to begin with, now add to that 2,000 miles. I get very lonely. He encourages me to go out, meet men, date. It's what I have to do, but my heart and my head aren't seeing eye to eye on the subject. All I know is that I still after almost0 months can not wait to see him again, to touch him and to share a few precious moments with him.

He once said to me, "I don't know if we will be lifelong lovers, I sure hope so. But I do know we will be life long friends."Isn't that what love is about? Being friends and lovers? Some days I do wish he was here with me, ok most days. But at least I can cherish his friendship and the love we share. Thanks for listening.... This has been the first time I could share my story with anyone.