Evening Dove

I wasn't looking for anyone when he came along. I had been divorced for8 years and ended a 4 year relationship 8 years ago. I had a couple of relationships inbetween but then I decided that I would rather be alone than end up with the wrong guy again. I met him through my job, on the phone at first, then he had an appointment to come in and we met face to face. I was not attracted at all, in fact he is about 23 years older than me. But we still talked almost everyday and his sense of humor was captivating. He understood and sympathized with the role of single parent and wondered how I did it all day after day and still seemed to be a happy person. We dicussed sex, he assured me he was clean, I knew I was and 6 months later we felt we trusted each other enough to share that intimate part of ourselves. Have you ever heard the song, " fooled around and fell in love"? Well, that is just what happened to us.

I have never been sorry that it happened but I do wish it could be different. I want to scream to the world how wonderful he is to me and my kids and I'm tired of hiding or going out to dinner hoping we don't run into anyone we know. I know there is no chance of divorce and I wouldn't ever expect him to divorce her. They are in their early 70's and they just lost their son suddenly last year so she would not be able to cope with a divorce now. I know my place in his life but I don't always like it, I just accept it because I have no other choice.

The time that we do have together is filled with love, passion, tendeness, conversation and plenty of TLC. I do feel guilty because I never thought I would end up in a situation that is immoral but I love him and never before in my life have I ever felt this loved by anyone, not even my parents. He has opend my eyes to the kind of person he sees in me and I have learned to love myself again because of him. I have gone back to school part time to try and get ahead in the world because I finally believe I am deserving of it and I am smart enough to do it.

He has brought so much good into my world, I can't believe that what we have is wrong or immoral and I am so grateful he is a part of my life. Oh yes and by the way, he is the best partner I have ever had in bed, he always makes sure I am satisfied at least twice before he leaves!