Teri

MM and I met three years ago when I joined a bowling league he was on. I was also married at the time. We chatted every once in a while, but no real friendship. After knowing each other a year and a half, we exchanged e-mail addresses one night. My H move to NM in Jan. 98 to take a new job and I was suppose to follow when I graduate with my B.A. in August. My marriage wasn't very good and I had been thinking about getting out for a while. As soon as hubby was gone, MM starting e-mailing me more. I had had a crush on him and was enjoying the attention. He started making sexual indoindo and I returned them. The next thing I know, we are in bed together. A week later my mother died and MM was there for me. I wrote pages and pages of e-mails to him getting all the hurt out while my H was concerned about his own problems.

The next month I told H I wanted out. It really didn't have anything to do with MM. I was already unhappy and with H living 200 miles away, I realized how happy I was without him.

I have since fallen madly in love with MM! He is aware of my feelings and says that his are not the same for me. We only get to see each other about once a week. Sometimes less, every great once in a while, more. We e-mail and IM each other all day when he is at work. We are very close friends. We talk all the time and I feel I and do tell him everything. I personally think that he is love with me, even if he won't admit it. A friend at bowling approached me one night and asked if there had been anything between him and I. I asked her why she was asking. She said one night she noticed him sitting by himself and watching me. She said he had puppy dog eyes and love was written all over her face. She said she knew from the look that he was in love with me and that there was or had been something between us. She said she has seen that look numerous other times when he looks at me.

In a nutshell, he claims to be happily married except for the lack of sex at home. I think he is just comfortable and is afraid to rock the boat. I'm just waiting to see what happens. I love him and I want to be able to show him that and I want for him to return my love. I have made vast progress, but I'm not there yet. I'm trying to take one step at a time and hope he realizes what he is missing and becomes mine one day. I try to be happy with what I can get for him and hope there will be more later.